Public Speaking

One thing I've learned about public speaking over the years; is that a lot of people have it, people you wouldn't expect to have it. If you see how I am around my friends, you would never believe that i was/am afraid to speak in front of an audience. I've always had that phobia. When i was in middle school my teachers would always have the students read something in front of the class. When it was my turn to go, my hand s would get so sweaty, and i'd start to stutter, and i'd feel really hot and my entire body would get and my face would get sweaty. I would do and say what i would have to say, but very monotoned and quick because i wanted to get the trial at hand over and done with despite my grade of the assigned task.

I got better with public speaking in high school. I did what Paul Martin Lester said one of those tips; I got a rush and started to like the adrenaline rush, and just pretended to be out going, but only on stage though. It was partly that and that i got tired of not expressing myself and letting my voice be heard when i wanted it to. I realized that no body would always ask me my opinion about things and that if i stayed quite all the time then no one would really care if i said anything or not because i never said anything to began with. Yeah i did let my voice out with my art but if i wanted to reach more people i would have to speak up and talk for myself and get my point across on my own. It wasn't just public speaking, with just talking to some people in general, some times i would feel so intimidated by an individual's presence, and then have about 20 of those people in one class room and you have to say something or preform in front of them. i was always thought about look stupid and making a fool out of myself in front of people. As time went by, i became more comfortable with myself, because i saw that other people were human and had fears like me, and were just like me in some ways and i just said fuck it, and faced my fears and just did it, when it came speaking in front of a class.

Because i did it so much in high school, it became easier and i got better at it, and i didn't get all sweaty and hot, or as nervous as i use to. i did most of the speaking in front of a class room, in my english classes when we had reenact scenes of books, plays, or movies we were studying at the time, or in my civics class when we would research and have discussions about politics and government we would have to take sides based on on our own views and have to explain our own thoughts and reasons for taking the stands we took. My teacher even recommended to join a debate team, which i did't join because i had a lot already going on at the time. I got so use to speaking in front of people that i even taught an art class at a recreation center by my school with a few friends. But it's been a while since i had to talk in front of an audience i would probably have to practice before i get as comfortable as i use to be in high school when i was doing it a lot.

what really helped me was admitting my fear of speaking in front of people and facing it, and learning how to defeat the the thing that was preventing me to do it. Because i was and still am quiet a lot, i think a lot, about all my insecurities, and how i can get over them, and the act i have to do to over come, whats was holding me back. I was always afraid of making my self look stupid in front of people, but sometimes i would want something so bad that i would ignore that voice in my head and go for it anyway. Over time i realized that i have done things that made come out of my shell so much that i kind of got use to it, or looked back and thought "well i've done some thing worst than this, so why not". and with a lot of lectures with from dad about speaking up and not letting people get over on me and about being shy and etc. He told me that a man knows when to talk and when to listen.when think back to why i was so quite i really cant remember the reason but i think it was because as a child i would be loud and making my mom mad, and i did want to make anybody angry if i accidentally said something wrong